I am officially angry--angry for the things that I do not know. Maybe there are specific things that made me angry today but to sum it up, I myself cannot explain this feeling inside. I don't want to be angry, to sin, to hurt anyone with my mood swings, and to ruin anyone's day because of this spoiled tantrum.
I went out of the office tonight feeling that burden. I was supposed to finish the editing of the multimedia and have it submitted again after our teacher in FS said that we still do not have a grade. I am referring to my group who did not have any single contribution to this project. I am not bragging for shouldering the activity. That is the truth. And thinking that someone from the office can help me, I went there. But nothing happened. At the end of the day, I failed to pass the multimedia. I have to wait for this day to end so that by tomorrow, I would be hopefully done with this task. This activity has stressed me for many nights already and unless this will not be sent via e-mail to our teacher within this short span of time, I will never settle down. My favored video was downloaded but it was not enough. It cannot be attached to my Powerpoint Presentation because of so many reasons. It would just make this post super duper ultra mega long.
Anyhow, I went home heavy hearted. I want to burst into tears. I want to throw something. I want to hit someone. I want to heave a deep sigh from the deepest abyss of the empty red organ in my chest. I want to go to another world. But it seems blurry, all of it. Nothing will happen to me if I will stay drowning in this state. YES! I am angry. I am angry, not to anyone, but to how things has worked out. I am not blaming anyone. I am not seeking for chaos. I just want to express this feeling within.
So please bare with me!