Disappointed

I have been away from the blogosphere for a little while now. There have been a lot of things going on with my life, and oops, sorry for not sharing it here--small victories, happiness, laughters, and even little tears. But there is nothing worth blogging than the disappointment I am feeling right now. I just can't afford to have this pass without pouring out everything here. So I think I have to say sorry first before I continue. I am sorry, dear readers, for this outburst. Don't worry, I shall smile after this. 

This is not a blame game. I am not even sure whom to blame, but I think it is not right to do so. There are just instances wherein you have been expecting a lot from a particular person because you believed in his/her capabilities to perform a particular task according to how you expected it to be. But life could be so tricky. Twists come and oftentimes, you are not prepared for its arrival. All along, you have been looking forward to a perfect output, and just to end up disappointed for it is not what you expected it to be. And what do you get? Just the mere utterance of the word "sorry." You cannot even see them exert an effort to prove that they really mean what they said. How's that? What I am supposed to do with this person? I am done with the reprimands. Well, I think I just have to wait. More waiting. And let time heal this bad feeling inside. 

****

There will be a lot of things at stake and will be blamed at you once you become the editor-in-chief of the school paper. I have not felt the heaviness of such responsibility before I became one, and being the EIC in the high school paper before and now in college, is far different. This is more DIFFICULT, and more serious. 

People whom you thought would help you will become the same people who will be the source of a major disappointment. Sorry but I cannot share the story here. 

What I can do now is just to move my head, rethink of what happened for ten million times, and utter "I'm sorry" to the people whom I have also accidentally disappointed. I am actually just a victim here, although not the purely innocent one, but since I am the head of the publication, the justification that I did not know about what happened will not suffice the anger of those who are disappointed at me. 

My words might sound topsy-turvy. Sorry for that. I just can't seem to be right with my thoughts at this moment. 

I'll be back with a happier tone soon. And a lot of goofy pictures. As of now, thanks for dropping by.

One Embarrassment For Today

I have been caught in so many embarrassing instances that I could not already comprehend how thick faced I have become. Urgh! I could be just so clumsy at times and with the environment spicing up my clumsiness, I turn out to be a laughingstock.

This afternoon, I attended our speech choir practice at the mini-theater of our college. I have a solo part in that piece of ours, just so you know. So there I was ready to step forward and utter my line. I felt numb but I think I was brave enough to fight it. I was able to move my legs and advanced to the center. I delivered the first two sentences of my share with confidence. I know that I have to do good because two of our Education teachers are watching us, and they are evaluating how far we have mastered the piece. 

Then, my brain just completely turned blank (as in total block-out happening inside my membrane). I could not think of any other good reason not to destroy the composure that I have established during the delivery. Unaware, I turned to my colleagues and asked them what my next line was. They all burst into boisterous laughter and I stood there completely clueless of what defense mechanism to enact. I was totally screwed during that time. I did not afford to look at our teacher and the audience. I just smiled and gave a faint laugh for the mistake that I have done, but deep inside, I could still see the vivid picture of their bullying reaction to my lapse. It crushed me. I wanted to drop and cry but I mustn't. I know it is not the right thing to do. 

Though the teachers did not overtly react to my mistake, I know they are now more keen at observing me perform. We did retakes and thank God, I did not forget my lines already. But I was still pressured. Everybody's eyes are now glued to me. 

Tomorrow is our dress rehearsal, and I shall have to struggle uttering those lines again. Oh God! I really need your help. I don't want to be embarrassed again. (insert sad face here)

One Smile For Today

Yeah right. I have been silent for so many weeks now, but since I have this opportunity to spill my orange juices online, I shall blog again. (hahaha) And there is something worth sharing for.

So there I was, sitting in front of the monitor. I checked my e-mail firsthand, expecting for a reply from our school paper adviser. Alas! I found out there is nothing in my inbox which is addressed to his name. I scrolled down the page and decided to erase Facebook mails and other stray mails. Then, I stumbled upon this one mail with this subject: hey! ps u don't know me, but read this email, i'll explain!

I have read the subject two days ago but I ignored the mail thinking that it was a prank or a virus. (hahaha). Today, I just do not know what kind of nerve urged me to open it. As I slowly read the message, I found out I was wrong about my earlier suspicion. It was indeed a blessing that I opened the mail today.

The message said:

I felt super duper ecstatic that I immediately placed my fingers on the keyboard and began tapping it. Let me share my reply:

Yeah. There we go. This is going to be a very strenuous day. I shall have to go to my speech choir practice now. Tootles!! :))))

The Editorial Staff of TN (2012-2013)

Before the month of August completely ends, I am proud to introduce to you the staff members of The NORSUnian for the school year 2012-2013 in their retro-themed attires. I have been away from the blogosphere for almost a month now because of the bulky stuffs I have to attend to both in the academe and in the publication. But now that I am back, enjoy the unedited photo flood. ^_^

The Editorial Board

Editor-in-Chief

Rolyn Jane P. Catanus

The lean meat. The sole female specie in the Ed Board. The Orange Pulps.

Associate Editor

Albert C. Umbac

The poison ivy. I have always loved his eyes...and his height. Oh my goodness! A modelling agency should hire this guy. 

News Editor

Jessie P. Dolia

He is known for his well-articulated English communication skills. And he could be very funny-looking when he intends to be serious. Sorry Jest. haha

Arts and Graphics Unit Head

Paul Anthony M. Eso

Chuy! ^_^ The jack-of-all-trades of the pub. He can sing, can dance, can play the guitar effortlessly, can paint, can draw, and can do all these things simultaneously without destroying his chuyness. haha.

___________________________________________________________

The Senior Writers

Bubbly!

Mary Cherry S. Sanchez

Her voice would echo in the four walls of the office when she laughs. She is good at emceeing. A disc jockey, this lovely girl could be one of the sweetest gal you would ever know.

Carefree!

Joeylen A. dela Cruz

She would never run out of topic to talk about. She is very fond of singing that the clouds would always turn gray when she starts to hum a song. Kidding! ^_^

Loquacious!

Francis Ivan G. Ho

I think its inborn, his being loquacious. He would just rant about anything under the sun and would suddenly laugh out loud without us knowing the reason behind it. 

Madame!

Mei Anne A. Morales

The comeback of this once lost fella' really made her EIC proud of her. Way to go madame!

Cheerful!

Shenmae S. Sojor

Her smile would radiate inside the office. She has always been a sweet lass and her voice, oh so childish. You wouldn't know she is in her third year in college already. 

The Newbie Writers 

Arean Fel E. Dorio

She is as lean as me, but I know this girl has something more to show in the coming weeks. She is one of the hard working newbies I have observed so far. 

Ariel Dizon

Silent waters run deep. ooooohhhh!!

Jirah Kim Quinamot

He always calls me ate but no offense, I think I should be the one who'll call him kuya. hehe. He is a very good writer. Just a couple of tweaks and it's good to go. 

Mary Grace Bornales

The Filipina beauty who does not only love medicine but also writing. Just recently, we have discovered her artistic side after she won in the Poster Making contest of the university. Yebah!

Princess Ebo

Prencess Prenny is pretty. That's what I call her. Just like some of the aforementioned writers, she is also very talkative and smart. Oh yeah. Way to go Prenny. One of the hard working newbies, too. 

___________________________________________________________

Artists

Angelo K. Sastre

The John Lloyd of TN. Pogi. ahahah. ^_^

Ranulfo D. Repe, Jr. 

Artist indeed. His expertise? Painting. Napaka-advance kung maka-draw. Wagas!

Newbie Artist 

Karlo Billy Rubia

One of the best artists I have encountered in my whole life. Forte? Painting, caricature, etc. Five thumbs up!

Lay-out Artists

John R. Rio

The computer geek. He knows almost everything about computers and he is so hooked to 99 Designs. 

Leonil G. Dayado

The computer geek part II. 99 Designs addict part II. Vibes na vibes 'tong dalawang 'to. 

Newbie Lay-out Artists 

Paul Jun Sabaysabay

To bloom pa ito.

Hikaru Kanazawa

To bloom pa rin ito. 

__________________________________________________________

Photojournalists 

Kendrex B. Pael

The snappy Criminology guy. Another chuy. And spends his vacant time wallowing in front of a chess board with his colleagues in the pub.  

Junrel G. Paderes

He's been lost lately, but with a few warnings, I know this guy's gonna make a comeback. 

Mayette Hanna F. Diez

She can take pictures, she can write, and she can conquer the runway. A dean's lister and an Engineering stude.

Newbie Photojournalists

Kim Eden Belnas

A Biology major, and a good photojournalist. 

Marve Fabela

Silent but deadly, but not literally. ^_^

___________________________________________________________

The Business Unit

Business Manager

Myrna B. Alarcio

Happy, shalalala. She always smiles inside the office. And she loves the color brown. They have a cold war going on with the Associate Ed -- a cold war that I believe would lead them to a next-level relationship. haha. Pero char lang. EEEhhh. <3 p="p">

Assistant Business Manager

Lycel D. Caingcoy

Another bubbly girl who is very busy with their feasibility study right now. She'll soon have her gift shop, so we should all watch out for that. 

Staff Secretary

Jela Mae T. Ruales

A good writer, a bubbly friend. Her LOL giggles are my therapy. Once she laughs, everyone laughs with her. 

Circulation Manager 

Arvin V. Rodriguez

Oh my friend! Just like the two lay-out artists, he is also into 99 Designs and is a very good artist. He can paint, draw, and sketch. ^_^

Now, who do you think has the best retro attire? 

They are my second family and I love all of them. *winkies*

(Un) Intentional Errors

Situation 1

The lesson was on Homonyms...

Pupils: They went to the prison (sell, cell).

Teacher: Okay. What is the answer? 

Pupils: (majority, shouting) S-E-L-L!

Teacher: Okay. Correct. 

(pupils revel for their correct [incorrect] answer)

Situation 2

Now, Spelling...

Teacher: Okay class, read the following words.

Pupils: TEXTURE, BENEFIT...

Teacher: Is that the spelling of BENEFIT class? 

Pupils: (silencio dede...)

Teacher: (stared at the board, got a chalk, erased the letter E after letter N and replaced it with letter I) Now read. 

Pupils: BENIFIT!

*********************************

These are two of the many situations that made me twitch my face during my observation in one of the public schools here in our province. I did not write this to degrade the credibility of teachers for I will become one soon. I did not write this to make the world know that teachers could also be subject to errors. 

I admit I wanted to voice out my know-how regarding the errors of these teachers because I was concerned with the learning of the pupils. But I was reminded of what our teacher in Field Study said in our class. "Do not correct them in front of their class. It would be a reason for them to lose their credibility as teachers and their egos will be majorly hurt." I understand that perfectly. "Do not worry. They will realize their mistakes soon. Just let them correct their own mistakes. I believe those are unintentionally done," she continued. I nodded. Yes indeed. I have to respect the teacher I am observing. 

This inspired me to read more, read as often as I want to, and read everyday. In this way, I will be able to be a good  teacher someday, and as much as possible, a teacher who will not commit these mistakes. I know I still have to eat a lot of rice before I become a professional teacher. But it will come. With fervent prayers and hard work, I shall be a TEACHER. *insert big smiley here*

You are Loved

Even now that I am already in my fourth year in college, we are still required to take three units of Values Education. It might not sound right, for we often hear Values Education taught only in elementary and perhaps a little in high school. But I am thankful to whoever designed the curriculum for this Values Education class really is a big help especially to people who needs self-boost and more self-fulfillment and self-realization.

Let me share this poem we've read in our Values class. 

Be Happy You are Loved

Robert H. Schuller

Even if you have lost everything 

someone, somewhere, needs your love

Even if you have failed in love 

someone, somewhere, can give you the courage to try again.

Even if you have failed in life

 someone, somewhere, cares.

Even if you are ridiculed and rejected 

someone, somewhere, accepts you. 

Even if life has been unfair to you

 someone, somewhere, needs you the way you are.

Even if you are poor 

someone, somewhere, will treasure you. 

Even if you are trapped 

someone, somewhere, can liberate you with love.

Even if you are grief-stricken 

someone, somewhere, can fill the void. 

Even if you are dying

 someone, somewhere, loves you forever. 

Yes. This is such a beautiful poem. I have already highlighted my favorite phrase. How about you? Which phrase/s struck you? 

This is Insane!

Urgh!!! This is super insane. I have made a long entry, and I suppose it is a good one, but now it's all erased. It was not saved after I accidentally clicked the wrong button. Waaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!! I hate this. I have drained my best orange juices to that post and now, it's gone like a popped bubble. This is so frustrating. 

I hate this thing. The music is on, the people here in the office are busy making boisterous noise and all, and I am still furious. Urghhh!! My entry...huhuhuh...it's totally deleted. *sobs and cries* 

But then again, I could be insane at times. This recklessness of mine could be funny at times and only I can understand. hahay. The kitten has laughed at me now. Haaay!! Mixed emotions I have now. No more "Random Thoughts Part 23." It shall come when I'll have my sanity back. As of the moment, I shall to wallow in my furious slash funny slash reckless self. Tsk! 

The Pinning Ceremony (with a twist)

July 9, 2012 is date for the Negros Oriental State University--College of Education's (Main Campus I) First Ever Pinning and Candle Lighting Ceremony. Congratulations to all the senior students who will be having their practice teaching next semester. 

I, for one, am excited for next semester's practice teaching and we will already be deployed to our respective schools of choice soon. The Pinning  and Candle Lighting Ceremony, though unrehearsed, ended well. But before it happened, there was a certain twist. 

I went to school earlier today but later found out that I was just right on time for the mass. Much to my horror, I realized I was wearing the wrong uniform. Instead of the skirt, I was wearing my pair of slacks (and to think I have no single idea why everyone knew that the pinning ceremony required us to wear our skirts and not our slacks). Dang! 

What am I gonna do now? I do not want to be scolded. -_-

I tried to solicit help from my close friends but our efforts were of no avail. I decided not to attend the mass. I hurried to the office, clueless of what to do. There, I found my sister talking (again) and I told her my big dilemma. 

Si Ate Merms tej. Text her. (Ate Merms [Wilma] is my dear best friend)

I remembered my best friend. I called her for the nth time but no one answered on the other line. I thought she did not get my calls. Hoping that the mass would take a longer time, I waited for Wilma in the office. I kept my fingers crossed that she got my text messages and my missed calls. 

Finally, at 9 o'clock, she came in, smiling. I told her my problem and asked her to borrow her skirt. Without further chars, she went home, came back 15 minutes later and was panting. I thanked her a million times, changed my outfit, rushed to the gymnasium, and arrived just minutes before the procession starts. 

So there I finally was, beaming with pride beside my father who latched me my personalized pin. 

Hooo! What a day! 

Lessons learned: 

• Always ask for clarifications one night before the event. 
• A real friend will do everything to help you -- even if it means missing her P.E. class. 

That One Peso Coin

"Gravity is a contributing factor in nearly 73 percent of all accidents involving falling objects."

--Dave Barry--

Many nights ago, I decided to drop by a nearby internet shop to print an important file. Since it has been my habit to just e-mail the file to the shop's address, I need not bring a flash drive. Every now and then, I visit that cafe for printing purposes---school projects, school paper dummy, raw facts from the internet. But because of a one-peso coin, I think it's time for me to stop visiting that internet shop for good.

I approached the counter and told the lady-in-charge that I will retrieve a file from the Yahoo Mail. She gave me a half smile, raised her right brow, and sat on her plastic chair. 

"Unsa'y subject?" (What is the subject of your mail?)

"The Ventriloquist," I replied with a smile.  

I waited and at the same time talked with my companion. We were laughing at a certain nonsense topic and I was scratching my two-peso coins. From where I was standing during that time, the printer was just below my nose. 

After the printer made its grunt, a peculiar, minute clang was heard. There, I realized that I lost grip of my one peso coin and it went diving into the wide opening of the printer. Oops!

With all honesty and conviction, I told the lady-in-charge that my one peso coin fell into their gadget. She gave a short, stern look and continued printing my file. Her loud reaction came after she found out that the print-out has now followed a crooked pattern. No one will accept such kind of printing quality. That means I am in trouble. That means I have to be responsible enough to face the consequences of my action.

But I have one justification. I DID NOT MEAN IT. Nobody wanted that to happen. And no one would drop a coin into the printer for no apparent reason. 

She was murmuring while detaching the wires of the printer. She turned it upside down and hoped for the coin to fall. But it did not. The people inside the internet cafe started to react. I was on a corner, still, yet smiling. (as if nothing happened) I was a little bit embarrassed for what I did but I managed to say sorry. 

After several minutes of standing there and watching her curse, I finally broke my silence and gave the lady my two-peso coin. (I fished another one-peso coin from my purse) Time is running and I have to go home. 

I gave it to her, which she readily accepted, and without any hesitations, she told me with an angry tone, "Miss mangayo ra ko sa imung complete name and number kay just in case mangutana tong among amo ug unsay nahitabo, dili kami muy makasab-an." 

I replied with the widest smile I could possibly exhibit. "Oh sure. Where's your paper and pen? Just text me if you need my help." (lol. ang confident ng lola) 

Grabbing my bag and paper filer, I stormed out of the shop, wearing a poker face.

Lesson learned: This is all gravity's fault. But of course, I have to be more careful next time. ^_^

To the lady-in-charge of that inter cafe: I am so sorry for my recklessness and for smiling too much. That is just my defense mechanism to overcome embarrassments.

A Farewell Gift

This time, I did not ask him to buy me anything. I thought twice was enough. Anyway, I know he won't bother buying me anything from his trip on the other island. I did not bother myself. I have a lot of things to think of as of the moment. But brownies? Oh sure. I can always change my mind and think again. ^_^

After a tiresome day in school and a meeting to attend, perhaps receiving one box of this stuff is already a great consolation. And I had mine, from my dear bespren. How sweet and thoughtful of him to remember. He brought it to the office in the middle of a meeting. haha.

But the thought that it would be my last glimpse of him this year and the certainty that I will not be texting him more often now because he will be busy with his life are two of the things that makes me shut my mouth and just stare at nothingness with a blank face. I will miss him, absolutely. 

aw.....

Anyway, life's like that. :) Ces't la vie. Goodbye crushie crush. 'Til we meet again. ^_^

The Monster is Back

"Writing about a writer's block is better than not writing at all." 

--Charles Bukowski, The Last Night of the Earth Poems--

This is not the first time that I have written about my writer's block. I have posted a lot of statuses in Facebook about how stupid I am for not coming up with a topic to write about. And every time I sit in front of the monitor and make an attempt to write about something because of a coming deadline which I myself have set, nothing comes out of my head. I feel futile, useless, and it makes me less of a writer. 

But seemingly, this perception will change for good. Starting today, this perception will turn 180 degrees away from me. I have sought for a good quote on writer's block in the internet, and I managed to stumble upon that inspiring quote up there. 

See? I have been murmuring about writer's block and how it makes me vain, but upon writing about it, I have already written something. This is quite a paradox, but it amused me. Thanks to Charles Bukowski. 

Of Setting Standards and Being Liked

"Let every man judge according to his own standards, by what he has himself read, not by what others tell him." 

--Albert Einstein--

We live by other people's standards. We are who we are because it is what they want us to be. But more importantly, we live because we have our own standards. People just tend to misinterpret our purpose sometimes and we are automatically bad. We are automatically what they think we're not. 

For no matter how we try to meet their standards, their perception towards us would always define us in their sight. And no matter how we try to act accordingly, there is still no amount of explanation that could justify our good intention.

However, pursuing for manly approval is vain. Everything else is fleeting. The best person we should impress is Jesus Christ. He does not judge us for our physical attributes, He looks at our heart. 

We all want to portray the best possible picture here on Earth, to the people surrounding us. But remember, there is someone up there who has better plans for us. (Jeremiah 29:11)

It is then now not our concern if people do not like us, if we do not meet their standards. The most important thing is that we follow what God tells us to do, we live according to His will, and we abide in Him alone. By this, all good things shall follow. (Matthew 6:33)

One Quote for Day 1

I cannot think of anything to blog during the past days, and every time I make an attempt to write something, I just can't connect my ideas together to make a good article. There are just so much of these ideas coming in and out of my mind. 

So here I am, making a challenge for myself. This will last for 30 straight days, so please keep in touch and bear with my quotes. ^_^

Here's for Day 1. 

"I have noticed that even people who claim everything is predestined, and that we can do nothing to change it, look before they cross the road." 

--Stephen Hawking--

Just the Typical Sunny Day

This is going to the trash bin. My entire absence in the blogsphere these past few days is due to the extreme load of work I am having regarding the academe and the student publication. And every time I stare at this blank sheet and the blinking cursor, I end up writing nothing. So please bear with the orange peelings.

I have nothing to write actually -- nothing sensible, nothing so exciting about my life. Just the typical Orange Pulps who always do everything in a hurry, and after the tiresome class schedule, goes to the office to check on articles, reprimand writers, and whine about it in a corner because they did not heed what I said. (tsk)

But I am missing someone, so I will just dedicate this poem to him. (hahahaha)

Words Can't Tell...

...how much I miss you.

...how much I yearn for your presence.

...how my phone becomes useless without your name flashing on the screen.

...how a day becomes incomplete without seeing you.

This is not even a poem. *hoots and sighs* But I know you will bear with me. I am not completely sane when I wrote this post. haha. Have a great day with GOD! ^_^

I Get that Feeling a Lot

Have you ever been in a situation where you're left with no choice, and after that, feeling extremely broke and frustrated? 

I have been doing this before but this time, I felt convicted with what I did. Yesterday, I absented in two of my classes and missed one quiz and a reportorial. 

First reason. I went to the printing press to bring the lay-out of our school paper. As I went there, I have brought with me the awareness that there will be a possibility of missing my third class in the morning. But I thought that my business in the publication house is more important than my class so I stayed until the head editor said OK. 

Just as I made my way back to the university, my classmate told me that I missed my chance to report. Hopefully, as I return to that class tomorrow, my teacher would still give me the chance to report and make-up the absence that I have made.

Second reason. I procrastinate, a lot! That's the number one thing I hate about myself. Urgh! And I do not know how to get out of it. 

We were given an assignment in our teacher in FS 6 on the Strands of Desired Teaching Performance and Performance Indicators (you don't need to understand these terms for these are Education jargons). That happened a week ago. As what procrastinators do, I delayed the assignment for many days, and on the day of the deadline, I was not able to pass it. I missed the extra 5 points. -_-

I absented on my second class in the afternoon just to finish my assignment, thus making me miss a quiz.

I felt terrible after that. Super terrible. I felt like I am the worst student I have ever been in my entire life. And now, I only have two semesters left to change it all. I mean 360-degree change. I will be graduating very soon. So help me GOD! :'(

I Cried Today Because of my Teacher's Story

I was not expecting for any drama moments today. Our Developmental Reading 2 class was not even intended for that. But as we were settled in for the new discussion, our teacher drew a bondpaper from her drawer and started saying, "I will read to you a short story. You listen carefully. I don't want anyone to write anything. Just listen." 

And so we did. We tried to be as keen listeners as possible because there were questions to answer after the story is read. 

"Eight Lies of a Mother," she started.

As the story reading went on, I felt something odd inside me. Inside my chest, to be specific. At first, I thought it was normal. But as the reading of the story went on, and as I slowly craned my neck for possible reactions from my classmates about the story, my eyes turned watery and tears tried to fall. I managed to wipe them later, but it seemed to be too late. My classmates have also been wiping their eyes. I even saw one of my tough classmates who was known to be a "bad guy" cry. 

I could say our teacher was a good story teller and the story was indeed very beautiful and very touching. Try reading the story and share your sentiments later. Just click this link: 

Eight Lies of a Mother.

Eight Lies of a Mother

This is a quite long story but I advise you to read it until the end. Then, you would know why I told you so. 

The story began when I was a child; I was born as a son of a poor family. Even for eating, we often got lack of food. Whenever the time for eating comes, mother often gave me her portion of rice. While she was removing her rice into my bowl, she would say “Eat this rice, son. I’m not hungry”. That was Mother's First Lie. 

When I was getting to grow up, the persevering mother gave her spare time for fishing in a river near our house, she hoped that from the fishes she got, she could gave me a little bit nutritious food for my growth. After fishing, she would cook the fishes to be a fresh fish soup, which raised my appetite. While I was eating the soup, mother would sit beside me and eat the rest meat of fish, which was still on the bone of the fish I ate. My heart was touched when I saw it. I then used my chopstick and gave the other fish to her. But she immediately refused it and said “Eat this fish, son. I don’t really like fish.” That was Mother's Second Lie. 

Then, when I was in Junior High School, to fund my study, mother went to an economic enterprise to bring some used-matches boxes that would be stuck in. It gave her some money for covering our needs. As the winter came, I woke up from my sleep and looked at my mother who was still awoke, supported by a little candlelight and within her perseverance she continued the work of sticking some used-matches box. I said, “Mother, go to sleep, it’s late, tomorrow morning you still have to go for work.” Mother smiled and said “Go to sleep, dear. I’m not tired.” That was Mother's Third Lie. 

At the time of final term, mother asked for a leave from her work in order to accompany me. While the daytime was coming and the heat of the sun was starting to shine, the strong and persevering mother waited for me under the heat of the sun’s shine for several hours. As the bell rang, which indicated that the final exam had finished, mother immediately welcomed me and poured me a glass of tea that she had prepared before in a cold bottle. The very thick tea was not as thick as my mother’s love, which was much thicker. Seeing my mother covering with perspiration, I at once gave her my glass and asked her to drink too. Mother said “Drink, son. I’m not thirsty!”. That was Mother's Fourth Lie. That was Mother's Fourth Lie. 

After the death of my father because of illness, my poor mother had to play her role as a single parent. By held on her former job, she had to fund our needs alone. Our family’s life was more complicated. No days without sufferance. Seeing our family’s condition that was getting worse, there was a nice uncle who lived near my house came to help us, either in a big problem and a small problem. Our other neighbors who lived next to us saw that our family’s life was so unfortunate, they often advised my mother to marry again. But mother, who was stubborn, didn’t care to their advice, she said “I don’t need love.” That was Mother's Fifth Lie. 

After I had finished my study and then got a job, it was the time for my old mother to retire. But she didn’t want to; she was sincere to go to the marketplace every morning, just to sell some vegetable for fulfilling her needs. I, who worked in the other city, often sent her some money to help her in fulfilling her needs, but she was stubborn for not accepting the money. She even sent the money back to me. She said “I have enough money.” That was Mother's Sixth Lie. 

After graduated from Bachelor Degree, I then continued my study to Master Degree. I took the degree, which was funded by a company through a scholarship program, from a famous University in America. I finally worked in the company. Within a quite high salary, I intended to take my mother to enjoy her life in America. But my lovely mother didn’t want to bother her son, she said to me “I’m not used to.” That was Mother's Seventh Lie. 

After entering her old age, mother got a flank cancer and had to be hospitalized. I, who lived in miles away and across the ocean, directly went home to visit my dearest mother. She lied down in weakness on her bed after having an operation. Mother, who looked so old, was staring at me in deep yearn. She tried to spread her smile on her face; even it looked so stiff because of the disease she held out. It was clear enough to see how the disease broke my mother’s body, thus she looked so weak and thin. I stared at my mother within tears flowing on my face. My heart was hurt, so hurt, seeing my mother on that condition. But mother, with her strength, said “Don’t cry, my dear. I’m not in pain.” That was Mother's Eight Lie. 

After saying her eighth lie, my dearest mother closed her eyes forever.